Who said you could touch me

Yes, yes, I know. Sorry for my extended absence, but I've had very limited access to the interwebs for the last couple of weeks, and besides, I seriously hope you all don't think I have nothing better to do than sit and blog about idiots. Pfft. I have a life.

Lies aside for now, though, I'm back with something that could almost partially resemble a vengeance, and ready to rock. So. Things, idiots, grievances.

Introducing: Ms. Clingy.
Ms. Clingy is a second-year student who has all the wit and charm of a semi-retarded horse. Initially I thought she may have Asperger's Syndrome, but no, she's just annoying. Within five minutes of asking if she could hang out with my friend and I, she was already attempting to delve into my personal life by asking me if I was straight or gay. Yeah, maybe I'll tell you that sort of stuff when you actually learn my name.

Ms. Clingy is the kind of person who made no friends in her first year and thus, to compensate, is trying to make all of the new first-years like her (and I think, failing really badly). Amusing note though, a friend and I both happened to look to the wrong side of the class at the wrong time, for we saw Ms. Clingy stand up, but her pants didn't exactly come up with her. So - friend and I were treated to what might as well have been a square meter of pure buttcrack. O my brothers, it was golden. And oh so terrible.

Introducing: The Fat Sarcastic Star Trek Fan.
Not just a stereotype anymore! Actually, "sarcastic" may not be quite the word for it, as his attempts at sarcasm are not only usually very base, but also tend to intermingle heavily with his attempts to make everyone in the class like him.

I hate him. But I almost - ALMOST - feel sorry for him. You know those really uncomfortable moments when you've made a few cracks that have gone over reasonably well, and then you get cocky and make one that fails horribly and awkwardly? Well, The Fat Sarcastic Star Trek Fan made an award-winning awkward moment the other day.

There's a pleasant Irish man in our Editing class. However, Fat Sarcastic Star Trek Fan must not have been previously aware of this. So, the lecturer asked the Irish man to read from the notes she gave us, and said to the class, "I hope everyone likes Irish accents!" To this, Fat Sarcastic Star Trek Fan responded, in the most horribly cliched Irish imitation I've ever heard, "Ah, tobesure, tobesure!" Cue awkward silence, cue ugly moment. After what felt like a minute, the lecturer said, "Yeaaaah... that's a bit of a stereotype there." Ow.

Oh, there's plenty more, but more posts means more joy for all the girls and boys. Toodle-pip!